Do you have someone you love that you love but aren’t sure how to tell them? It can be hard to show someone you love them and want to be with them, and just saying “I love you” doesn’t always work.
Love Languages
Gary Chapman has written and studied five different love languages. Examining these love languages can help those who want to express love to others see what they want, strengthening the relationship.
Love languages are ways to give and receive love, and they can help in difficult relationships. Everyone doesn’t give and receive love the same way, and it is important that we are satisfied in our relationships and close to our partners if we want love to work. Taking action rather than just talking can help strengthen love.
We can see what our partners need and what we can do. Not everyone has the same love language, and even if someone has a different love language, the way that you give love is your own love language.
What Is Your Love Language?
You can look online and take quizzes that can help you figure out your own love language, but the way that you show love will show you what your love language is. Maybe you like to touch, or you like to give gifts. The way that you talk can be your love language.
Words of Affirmation
One of the most common of the five love languages is words of affirmation. This is when someone feels love by the way that people talk to them. You can show affection through words and express love by showing admiration for the person that you love.
The words that you say have a strong value to you, and the actions don’t even have more importance than the words in this sense. Words are the most powerful when you have words of affirmation as your love language. This isn’t just talking, but you can write someone a letter and tell them how amazing they are, or you can call them.
If words of affirmation are your love language, you will need to speak to them in an uplifting and meaningful way. You will have to tell them how much you love them and remember the small things you talked about. You even have to make sure that you communicate in words that make them feel special.
Acts of Service
Another love language is acts of service. In this case, actions are more important than words, and you can show your love by going out of your way to show them that you care. For example, you could plan a small vacation together or do something for them, like cleaning the house or taking out the trash, so that they feel appreciated.
If your partner is sick, you can make them soup or bring them medicine. This shows that you are taking action to show that you care. This can be a touchy love language because you don’t want to be the only one who is doing things in the relationship, so just doing spontaneous little things can show this love language.
Gifts
Gifts is a love language of giving. This doesn’t mean that you should give your partner these huge gifts, but it can be something small that you make or something meaningful. Those that have this love language like to buy gifts to show that they love someone. They will do it to share a memory or to show an inside joke.
Each small gesture has energy behind it and symbolizes love. You and your partner can do this by giving each other small, fun gifts.
Quality Time
Words, affection, gifts, and other things don’t work if your love language is quality time. This gift shows that you want to spend meaningful time with the person you love. It is easy to look back over your life and see the times you missed doing things with people you care about, and if you are super aware of this, then it probably means that this is your love language.
This can be something like spending time cooking dinner together or watching a movie together. This is when you or your partner put down your phone and really give each other the time that you want and need.
Physical Touch
Touching is another love language, and this is when you touch each other to express intimacy. This can be sex, hugs, kisses, or even just holding hands. Any form of physical touch can be a love language. This can be touching someone’s arm or putting your arm around someone when you appreciate them.
This is a connection made through the body, and some languages are based on physical touch to show that you love someone. Partners who don’t have the same love language sometimes have a hard time communicating this.
What if Someone Has a Different Love Language Than You?
A lot of times partners will have different love languages than the other, and this is okay. You have to realize what their love language is and try to make things better for the relationship. Here are some things you can do:
Know Your Love Language
If you are a gift giver, point out that you do that because you love the person. Speak up about your love language and make sure that your partner knows what you like and what makes you feel appreciated. It is important that you talk about this especially if your love language is different.
Be Proud of Your Love Language
No matter which love language you have, show it off and communicate it with your partner each time that you do something that follows your love language. Show them that you are showing love when you do it and what you mean.
Speak Their Love Language
You must try and speak your partner’s love language as well. If they have a different love language than you, you need to go out of your comfort zone and try to show them that you care in a way that they understand. Communicate with your partner what their love language is and that you will try and do what makes them feel appreciated.
Final Thoughts
It can be hard to tell someone that you love them if words of affirmation aren’t their language, and you need to strive to show them love the way that it makes them feel like you care. If they need you to spend quality time with them, do it, or if their love language is gifts, send them small cards or gifts in the mail or hand deliver them once in a while to show you care.
While I appreciate the effort, love languages seem overly simplistic. Relationships are way more complex than just five categories. 🤔
‘Physical touch’ seems obvious, but what if your partner isn’t comfortable with it? Communication is key! 🗝️
Exactly! Love isn’t a multiple-choice test. It’s about genuine connection, not fitting into boxes.
‘Quality time’ as a love language? Sounds like an excuse to binge-watch Netflix together and call it romance! 😆
‘Words of affirmation’ really hit home for me! It’s fascinating how different people interpret love differently based on their preferences.
This article is so enlightening! I never realized how important it is to understand love languages. Can’t wait to share this with my partner! 🌟
‘Exactly! Consent and comfort should always come first in any relationship.
This post makes me feel hopeful about love! Maybe understanding these languages could really change things for the better. 💖
“Gifts as a love language? So does that mean if I gift someone my old socks, it shows I care? 😂”
Yeah, nothing says romance like asking for permission before holding hands 😂!
‘Acts of service’ might work for some, but isn’t it a bit one-sided? Shouldn’t both partners put in equal effort? 🤨
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